I read the whole thing because you are worth it. You're worth the extra minute or two to read the whole story. I have no idea how to help you. I wish I could because I'm going through some of my own internal battles. But here's a suggestion... You don't have to do it. It probably won't even help in the long run. But just try it. Just take a whole weekend to yourself. Buckle down and get your school stuff done by Friday so your weekend is free. Don't see any friends or family. Just spend the weekend by yourself and do some activities that you enjoy. Go to a park and read in the nice sun. Go for a jog. Listen to some music. Anything in which you can just enjoy your own company. Paint your nails. Get a haircut. Make yourself feel good.

Let me know how it goes. I'm here if you need someone to talk to in the future.