Married 2 years. I'm early 23, he's 28.

He has always been a bit of a slob and I've always been okay with that. I work less than him, so I don't mind picking up after him if his mess bothers me.

In the last 6 months, it has gotten worse and is really affecting my feelings toward him, and I don't know how to address the issue without making him feel ashamed. It now feels like I'm taking care of a toddler. The problems are as follows:

He has been leaving trash out. I mean little things, like I asked him to wipe a counter, and the trash can was right there, and he left the paper towel on the counter after wiping it. Every cigarette butt gets kept in his pocket. Old food is left on plates.

He has 100% stopped rinsing his dishes. I'm a little astounded that every single thing he eats off of is getting left there. If he manages to get it to the kitchen, he doesn't rinse it.

He showers regularly, but rarely shaves anymore. He only brushes his teeth if I remind him. His teeth are turning yellow and I can't bring myself to kiss him anymore. His breath always stinks and every time I notice, I subtly bring up toothbrushing and he goes and brushes his teeth.

He clips his fingernails and leaves the clippings on the counter. He trims his pubes occasionally and leaves them on the edge of the bathtub.

Reddit, the worst of the worst is that last week, two days in a row, I found little plops of poop on the edge of the bathtub. They looked deliberate. I wiped the first one off, then when the second happened, we had a very awkward conversation that went like this:

"Is it just me or have there been little plops of poop on the bathtub?" "Umm? Oh, Yeah" "Please make that not happen anymore" "Okay, sorry"

WTF Reddit?! I want to just forget about it, but I woke up thinking about little plops of poop, and I am disgusted. I want my marriage to be what it was 6 months ago, when he shaved twice a week and had decent breath. I want to want to have sex with him again! Help me fix this!

UPDATE: Thank you for all your advice. I took all of your insights into our conversation about this, and things went really well. It turns out he doesn't have a mental disorder, and he's not secretly depressed. What he has is a hygiene problem even worse than I originally thought. He is really apologetic about the situation and is going to take better care of himself now. If things go downhill again in the future, I'll follow your advice and be much more vocal. You guys and gals are great. Thanks so much!